Temperamental Children

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these traits. Since there are several different factors that determine the temperament of an individual there are many ways to measure and stabilize the different levels of stimulation each for each person.

Learning about the temperament of a child is an extremely important aspect of raising a child. It would be important to watch your child’s behavior and really examine the characteristics they display as well as monitoring their behavior. It is important to objectively evaluate your child so you are able to determine the best child rearing practices for them.

The specific traits of a child’s personality are ultimately characteristics of reactivity. Each child will interact in a certain way based upon the environment they are in and because the child has a predisposition to that behavior. Each child is unique in their behavior, and you could have a child with an even temper when your own is more volatile. This type of child would approach things with a positive outlook, be predictable, of average intensity, and is also extremely adaptable. This child will likely be able to fit most any environment, and will be able to fulfill most any demands. There is also the child who is poorly behaved, unpredictable, and does not adapt well when there are changes. When things begin to change this is the child who will become extremely negative and very intense, nothing will placate the difficult child. It is important to remember patience, consistency, and objectivity with this child. Flexibility is a requirement for the parent of a slow to adapt child. Otherwise, frustration can create a great deal of anger on both sides. Nurturing a difficult child is certainly a challenge and parents must be sure to take some time away in order to maintain their own sanity. All the nuances of a child’s behavior have an effect on those around them, whether it affects a peer or an adult.

When the demands of the child’s environment becomes too much parents, teachers, and other adults can intervene and diffuse the situation. A healthy child is able to cope with the demands of the environment, in this case the child should be left to cope. Adults should only intervene if the child cannot cope with a situation and problems are developing, negative traits and behaviors are intensifying, it is an indication the adults need to step in and try to change the child’s environment. A parent who is able to accept their child even when difficult will be more able to provide an environment tailored to the child’s positive traits in order to subdue the negative ones.

In my own childhood I had many different types of experiences and was put into many different types of settings, family, social, or other types of situations that are still difficult to clearly define. Early childhood is the ideal time for the foundation of healthy emotional development to be built, when we learn about our emotions and how to regulate them. It was during this time in my life, from the age of three moving into adulthood, that the many different kinds of abuse began. I feel that this caused me problems in developing socially and emotionally in a healthy way. I experienced torture, abuse and neglect that began from a very young age and the experiences were with family members. These experiences contributed greatly to deep feelings of mistrust, not just of my family members but others as well. It made me feel as though kindness and compassion may have existed for others, but they did not exist in my life, and I did not believe they ever would. In order to protect myself I withdrew from others. I spoke as little as possible and chose to draw as little attention to myself as possible. It felt as though I was completely withdrawing from the people around me and my environment, as though I had become invisible. These experiences caused a ripple effect, I did poorly in school when I was quite capable of excelling, did not share my feelings on anything for fear of the repercussions, and never allowed anyone to get too close emotionally. It took more than thirty years for me to take off my cloak of invisibility and take steps back into the real world, a seriously scary experience as I had spent much of my life in the shadows. I am still learning to define and manage my emotions, and social situations can still be pretty difficult, but there is a certain freedom in shedding the past and moving towards a new future. I hope to use the experience to help others find their path in social and emotional growth in the future.