How Does Polygamy Impact the Lives of Those Involved in the Relationship

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In many polygamous relationships, women do not work or hold any source of income. In that case, it is hard to find women providing for their families. The man, therefore, is responsible for providing for all the women in the relationship. It is the duty of the man to ensure that all his wives and children are well feed, housed and even protected. According to Bruins (2006), polygamy seems to reduce the role of women in a relationship. In a normal marriage, the woman possesses the whole man to herself. This means, it is the work of this one woman to ensure all the will of this man are taken care off. For instance, if the man wants five children, it is the responsibility of this one woman to ensure the man gets the five children. The same goes for sex as well as other things.

In a polygamous relationship, however, the role of one woman is shared by a number of women, which means one woman is not supposed to do everything. Some women may enjoy being in a polygamous relationship since they know they are solely responsible for everything a man wants. For instance, a man in a polygamous relationship may chose to eat or sleep in any of his wife houses. This means the woman he has living in the house he has chosen to sleep or eat in is responsible for him that night (Al-Krenawi, 2012). Men, on the other hand, have their role intensified in a polygamous relationship.

The man in a monogamous relation has fewer responsibilities considering that he only has to provide for one woman and his children. Furthermore, the role of a woman in a polygamous relationship is limited to motherhood and other roles that feminists have worked hard to fight against. As Beach et al (2012) provide, the role of women in a polygamous relationship is not highly recognized in the society. In the Arab families for instance, the needs of women in this type of relationship are largely ignore (Beach et al., 2012). In addition to, women in polygamous marriages are forced to live with these conditions since seeking help from therapists is shameful (Beach et al., 2012).

Effects of Polygamy on those involved in the relationship

The Islamic families practicing polygamy in Ireland have shown how polygamy affects those who are involved in the relationship. Beach et al (2012), for instance argue on the aspects of societal structure, norms and values, providing that women involved in polygamy relationship in the Islamic families not only endure great deal of pressure, but also contribute to the development of psychological problems that are gender-dependent. To understand this issue, Beach et al (2012) considered a study, which was done by Abu-Baker in 2005 on the marital problems associated with polygamous marriages. One of the problems identified in the study was depression in wives that chose to remain silent regarding their relationship problems (Beach et al, 2012).

- Effect of Polygamy on women

According to Al-Krenawi (2013), women in polygamous marriages are also subjected to physical abuse when compared to women in monogamous marriages. Furthermore, the families of women in polygamous marriage regard their daughters as “hapless victims, un-entitled and unworthy” (Beach et al, 2012). Because most women in this form of relationship did not enter in the relationship by choice, they feel cheated, powerless, bullied and even condemned (Beach et al, 2012). Furthermore, the psychological problems these women are associated with are easily transferred to their children, especially children in families that are poor and less functional (Beach et al, 2012). These problems are largely associated with Irish Muslim women involved in polygamy (Al-Krenawi, 2013). Note that, since the Irish government does not condone polygamous marriages, women in polygamous marriages are risking the loss of rights to be supported by their husbands (Al-Krenawi, 2013).

- Effects on Men

While the effects of polygamous relationships seem adverse for women, study also shows that men in these relationships are affected too. This is according to Ghose (2015), who believes that men in polygamous relationships are risking heart problems. Drawing his insight from a research carried out by Dr. Amin Daoulah, Ghose asserts that men in a polygamous marriage are risking having blocked vessels (2015). This problem is mostly caused by the need for men to maintain a number of households, which affects them emotionally and financially. The Koran requires men in polygamous relationships to treat all their households fairly (Al.Krenawi, 2013). This can be stressful for a man with many spouses as well as a number of families. The study conducted by Dr. Daoulah provided results, which suggested that the more women a man had the more the man risked suffering from heart diseases (Ghose, 2015).

Despite that, the study by Dr. Daoulah failed to identify the main causes and effects that linked polygamy relationship with heart diseases in men, according to Ghose (2015). The same problem has been identified by Al-Krenawi (2013). Many men experience quilt conscience especially when their marriage choices are made by their families, who do not consider factors like poverty, which may hinder a man’s ability to provide for many family households (Al.Krenawi, 2013). Al-Krenawi (2013) study produced results, which suggest that while men in polygamous marriages in the Irish Muslim culture believe that the manner in which they treat their wives is fair, thus should be allowed to marry many wives, 27% of men provided that they cannot provide marital equality to all their wives, while others admitted that compatibility and jealousy was a major problem.

- Effect on Children

Research shows that polygamy not only affects men and women, but it also affects children. Polygamy has a negative effect on the relationship between a mother and her children. In these families, children mostly blame their mothers for not being able to prevent their father from neglecting their needs (Hamzah and Othman, 2010). The negative relationship between the husband and his wives make it impossible for children brought up in a polygamous marriage to develop stable relationships when they grow. This is simply because children are exposed to a relationship that is full of quarreling and other negative aspects. First wife children are more vulnerable compared to second wife children. Children born of the second wife grow up knowing that their father has another family (Hamzah and Othman, 2010). However, because children from the first wife came out first, they feel the lack of resources, time as well as the absence of their father (Hamzah and Othman, 2010).

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