Do the Stereotypes Impede or Help the Understanding of Desire?

Pengcheng Bao

Professor Slovik

EADII Final Draft

2018/4/15

Do The Stereotypes impede or help the Understanding of Desire

Living in the society people have lots of prejudice of the relationship between men and women. The men are judged as the violent and oppressive part, and the women is objectified by others. Julia Serano, the author of “Why Nice Guys Finish Last”, discuss one unique idea about the rape culture, and she provides a special idea that is prey/predator mindset. To be understood the prey/predator mindset the women always are defined as the sexual passive prey but the men are the sexual aggressors, even when the women indeed act as the active one. On the other hand, there exists another phenomenon which is the desires of being loved. The phenomenon of sexting is that the girls send to the guys they liked a naked picture but the picture is posted online, which story is described by the Rosin. Hanna Rosin, the author of “Why Kids Sext”, demonstrates a phenomenon of sexting that is the desire of people who want to be loved by the others and they also want to have intimate relationship with the one they love, and then their desires are exploited by sexting. The process of understanding why kids sext includes going through the desires for intimacy and the desire to be known and understood. Without any choice, the children should know how common it is sexting happened and how serious crime it should be under the law. Actually the Serano’s passage explained why the boys and girls acted in the passage of Rosin. These two passages best describe the perception toward the sex and romance is shaped by the prey/predator mindsets and the stereotypes impede the understanding toward the relationship. The predator/prey stereotypes will impede people to understand the role of male and performance of the female. However, the predator/prey stereotypes help us to explain the potential problem which is that the young boys and girls receiving lots of conflicting messages.

The predator/prey stereotypes will impede people to understand the role of male and the act of female. If one thing is generally defined as predator stereotypes or prey, it must be aggressive or passive for one person’s behavior. Thus, the personality of individuals may be constrained by the predator/prey stereotypes. As Serano demonstrated in her passage, “women, as prey, are expected to play down their sexuality-to hide or repress it. Good girls, after all, are supposed to be “virgins.” Women who do not downplay or repress their sexualities-that is, who do not act like prey-are viewed stereotypically as “whores.” As stereotypes, both “virgin” and “whore” are disempowering, because they both frame female sexuality in terms of the predator/prey mindset” (416). As this quote shows us, the stereotypes make individuals have a fixed thinking when one girl insists the virginity, she is defined as good girls. But when one girl tried to repress and downplay their sexualities, people call them as “whore”. It is very unfair because when the male act as the same as the “whore”, most of people think it is normal to be as predator. But actually whether the female is defined as virgin or the women are assumed as whore are very unfair and disempowering. The women have the less power and confidence to do what they actually want to do or become the one they expected. And even when the women tried to argue with the society to fight for their rights, the people in society may think they are ironic and cynical. The worse thing is that sometimes such feminists may be treated as shameless by female compatriots. The stereotypes of predator/prey actually cause the prejudice toward the male and female. Actually Rosin also describe the similar problem. “‘She is a whore. I’ve totally heard that she’s a whore.’ That comment came quickly; from a senior girl whose style was generally more refined” (392). This girl’s story gets her lots of troubles, because her picture is posted on Instagram and then the worst thing is that lots of people in her school would have her picture and define her as whore. Actually the picture is posted by her boyfriend, who is the one she trusted a lot. The predator/prey stereotype lead to the prejudice toward the women, because the people blamed the girl firstly and defined her as the whore. Nobody cares whether the girl is a victim or the girl is forced. The individuals look through the picture and then they discuss who is such whore to post the picture online. Actually such blames will be devastated for the girl, who will lose the trust on the guys and got hurt. As two passage describe, people are restrained by the predator/prey stereotypes. And the male is the predator, the female is the prey. If the prey tried to break the rule of society or become more aggressive, they are defined as whore and undertake the pressure they should not bear. When one female is active to seek for love and they are eager to be loved the others may be judged them. Although the mistakes, such as posting naked picture online, are not caused by women, the predator/ prey stereotypes will cause people to blame women.