How to Report and Write a News Story

...

Anita White, who taught at New Braunfels Middle School for 18 years before being transferred this month to the district's Learning Center, said Principal John Burks made the threat in a Jan. 21 meeting with eighth-grade science teachers. (This paragraph shows a logical transition...provides more factual details. When is answered in this paragraph.)

She said Burks was angry that scores on benchmark tests were not better, and the scores on the upcoming Texas Assessment of Knowledge and Skills tests must show improvement. (Logical transition...more factual details, according to the source.)

"He said if the TAKS scores were not as expected he would kill the teachers," White said. "He said, 'I will kill you all and kill myself.' He finished the meeting that way and we were in shock. Obviously, we talked about it among ourselves. He just threatened our lives. After he threatened to kill us, he said, 'You don't know how ruthless I can be.' "We walked out of the meeting just totally dumbfounded because it was not a joke," White said. (Quote adds the human aspect into the story...we hear from the source. It’s a very powerful quote.))

[pic 1]

New Braunfels police spokesman Mike Penshorn said the incident was filed as a verbal assault, but is being investigated as a terroristic threat. (More facts.)

Burks did not return a call seeking comment. Other teachers White said were at the meeting also did not return calls. (Reporter attempted to get others to comment; however, they did not return the calls before deadline...this is an effective way to demonstrate that the reporter made an effort to contact other sources.)

Jacob Gonzales, an eighth-grade science teacher at the school who was not at the meeting, said another teacher, besides White, mentioned it, telling Gonzales "it was not spoken in a joking manner and it kind of alarmed him and gave him an uneasy feeling." (Second hand source who spoke to others about the incident. However, always try another source...when one does not comment or return calls.)

New Braunfels School District spokeswoman Stephanie Ferguson said Burks told her it did not happen. She spoke to him after learning of the allegation from reporters. (School district spokesperson makes a statement.)

"I did not talk to the other teachers. Other than that, it is a personnel matter and I can't talk about it. We have not seen a police report," Burks said. (Actual quote.)

White said she decided to file the police report after one of the teachers spoke to a school board member about the incident, without result. She said she also plans to file a grievance with the school board. (More facts about why teacher filed report)

Before she filed the complaint on Saturday, White said, Burks told her she was being transferred to the Learning Center, which houses the district's disciplinary school, because of the test scores. She said her classes' standardized test scores were consistently the best in the grade. (More facts and White’s situation in the district after filing report.)

Ferguson later released a three-sentence statement that noted White filed the complaint after being reassigned. The statement quoted Burks as saying, "All personnel decisions are made with the best interests of students in mind." (Quote from school district spokesperson again.)

Many teachers complain about the importance placed on TAKS scores, saying a single, standardized test often does not measure how well their students are learning. (Shares how the TAKS test has some taking extreme measures.)

"It sounds like a case of TAKS tyranny taken to the extreme," said Joe Bean a spokesman for the Texas State Teachers Association, who said teachers and administrators are often punished for disappointing test performance. (A state teacher’s association source responds.)

"Once a principal gets a reputation as not able to get the scores that are required, that principal is virtually unemployable," he said. (Actual Quote.)

Bean said the TAKS provides only a snapshot of how students performed on that day and that students of some outstanding teachers and schools sometimes do not score well for a variety of reasons. (More from Bean...however, the story would have been stronger...if there had been a quote from the teacher who filed the report.)

RCROTEAU@EXPRESS-NEWS.NET

[pic 2]

[pic 3]

ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF INVERTED PYRAMID NEWS STORY WITH DIRECT LEAD FORMAT:

HPD: Stinky feet led to man's fatal stabbing By LINDSAY WISE

Copyright 2007 Houston Chronicle

A man allegedly stabbed his roommate to death Saturday night during a drunken argument over smelly feet, Houston police said. (It gets to the point. Answers who, what, when, why, how. Where comes in second paragraph.)

The two men shared a 10-foot-by-10-foot bedroom at the Magnolia Cove Apartment Homes in the 100 block of Goodson, said Sgt. M. Sosa of the homicide squad. (More details. See attribution: said Sgt. M. Sosa of the homicide squad.)

They subleased the bedroom from a married couple, who also lived in the apartment, Sosa said. (More details.)

On Saturday night, the woman was sitting outside with her newborn baby while the two roommates drank together inside, he said. The woman's husband was not home at the time. (More details.)

At some point, an argument broke out over one of the men's "stinky feet," Sosa said. It wasn't clear which one of the men's feet allegedly emitted the offensive odor, but the bedroom they shared "does smell," he said. (More details.)

About 8 p.m., the woman peeked inside the window and saw one of the men with two knives in his hands, Sosa said. (More details.)

"By the time she got inside, he was on top of the other man," he said. (More details.)

The woman called 911 and fled the apartment. "The suspect comes after her and says, 'I didn't mean to do it, I didn't mean to do it,'" Sosa said. (More details.)

Worried he might attack her or her baby, the woman alerted a neighbor, who held the man until police arrived, he said. (More details.)

Shortly